The countdown is on for Baby Faulkner's arrival. There are actually still four more weeks until the due date but people look at me and think I will go into labour imminently. I feel great. Isaac came three weeks early so we are thinking we should at least get a hospital bag ready ... and perhaps choose a name. Unfortunately, at my doctor's visit last week, my doctor thought the baby had turned again and is in the breech position. When I see the doctor next Thursday I am going to have an ultrasound to find out for sure which way the baby is resting. I am certainly praying
that I can avoid a c-section.
Thankfully the nursery is basically set up, the boys have transitioned to sharing a room with
bunk beds (Kohen is still coming to grips with his new found freedom from the crib), and we have a
minivan. The purchase took a little longer than we expected but it was an extra special treat to receive it on Josiah's birthday (he would have turned four years old on April 13th if he had lived). We took flowers to his grave and enjoyed birthday cake at home. Kohen keeps singing 'Happy Birthday' to Josiah ('Siah') even now. I have no idea why Kohen never figured out he could climb out of his crib if he wanted to, but I am happy he didn't. I do miss being able to put him in the crib when he is in need of a time-out.
Isaac made his first purchase. He chose to spend his money on a scooter. He had been enjoying Kohen's scooter, though it is designed for a younger child with two wheels on the front. I did the research and checked out the reviews and waited for it to go on sale. He is happy with his purchase.
Isaac enjoyed playing in his second piano recital, this time at a retirement home. His year-end recital is at the end of May, a day before Baby Faulkner is due. He knows his grandparents will take him if Graham and I are otherwise engaged. He loves all of his lessons, though not necessarily his practices (I feel the same way). We have a new saying that his teacher told him this week: "It's not hard, it's new." I really love the Music for Young Children program. Kohen also loves "playing" the piano, especially when he hits the button that makes the electronic piano play a classical song. He plays along and laughs and laughs.
I'm not sure how it came up but Graham and I started talking about an 'iron' (to be used for ironing clothes). Isaac asked, "What's an iron?" Oh, it's that thing we've been storing in the laundry room since around the time of your birth five years ago. You probably won't see it for a few years yet.
I wondered this week what I would be like if I didn't have anger or fear. Let's add in a little ambition (i.e. goals) for good measure. What if I thought less and did more? Let's give up the criticisms and self-focus while we're at it. Finally, let me find the key to turn on feelings and keep them on (other feelings than anger or fear). Oh yes, let's not forget contentment - an extra strong dose. How would my kids' life change as a consequence? I wish I could see more change and growth in my life. I am thankful for God's grace.
I enjoyed reading
this article about grief, written by a parent who lost a child. I guess it went around FaceBook but thankfully my sister-in-law sent it to me, saying she was thinking of Josiah.
These are three songs that I appreciated, especially around the time when we were waiting to hear about Baby Girl's health:
God I Look To You,
Be Still My Soul,
Oceans.
We went to a farm to see some day-old chicks today. Isaac and Kohen were even blessed with a tractor ride. Farmers certainly work hard.
Graham and I had a date last night and actually slept in a different house than Isaac and Kohen for the first time since Kohen's birth. We enjoyed a meal of Indian food, lots of laughter at a performance at our church by The Skit Guys, and we even had breakfast out this morning. It might take us another two years after Baby Girl is born so I'm glad we made the most of it. The boys didn't miss us as they were having too much fun with Grandma and Grandpa F.
Thanks for any prayers. I find labour and the aftermath with a newborn daunting and challenging. Actually, my birth experience with Josiah was awesome and the easiest part of life with him: epidural, sleep, push for 8 minutes, beautiful baby boy.
It's time for bed. Lord, I need to figure out how to juggle ... soon.
Blessings,
Elizabeth
1 Corinthians 15:42-43
42 So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; 43 it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power;
