Anticipatory grief

Isaac likes making French toast

There's not a whole lot to say, given that I wrote just a few days ago.  I've had some nice visits with friends this week.  I'm now having weekly appointments with my OB and those are going well.  Baby Faulkner is due three weeks tomorrow.  While we know that God has perfect timing, we're also letting Him know that we don't mind waiting for three more weeks. 

I had a florentine cookie today that I think might be from Costco - very yummy! 

We're still looking at baby names and trying to make a decision.  Isaac likes the saying, "Good plan Stan." (he responds by saying, "I'm not Stan.") so I joked that we should call the baby Stan and he thought that would be a good idea. 

The book, "When the Bough Breaks: forever after the death of a son or daughter" talks about sudden vs anticipated death.  In a sense, Josiah's death was both.  It was definitely sudden and we didn't expect it then but we had been told that he would die (due to another cause, still related to his heart) and we also knew that it could happen at any time from his birth onwards and we had certainly thought it might happen at various times.  The author writes, "the reality of the possibility of losing this child is never far from consciousness.  These parents have some chance to prepare.  Throughout the treatment and throughout the hope grieving continues.  This "anticipatory grief," as it is called is what changes the course of mourning after death.  Part of the grief-work has been done."  I remember reading in a magazine about heart parents (and I'm sure parents with children who have other diseases) having "chronic grief" (or something like that).  That  being said, we're certainly not finished grieving. 

It didn't work out to go to the cemetery today so we hope to go tomorrow afternoon. 

Thank you for your prayers!

Blessings,

Elizabeth

Romans 12:2
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.