Ramblings

I think I may be running out of things to write but I had always wanted to at least write daily until the one year anniversary of our ambulance ride to SickKids on July 31st, when I first started to post daily.

There are three blogs that I am trying to keep up with, all written by moms of heart babies.  The one baby went to Jesus in May.  Another baby is at SickKids waiting for a heart transplant.  The third is a young boy who is again needing heart surgery.  I read and remember the struggles and wish we were still in the struggle but I also root for these two children and another baby whom I met at SickKids and is still awaiting a transplant.  I pray and hope that God will deliver them.  We wished that we could have donated an organ from Josiah's body but due to his constant low oxygen saturation, nothing at all was acceptable.  It would have been amazing to know that his body helped another little one.

I had a phone conversation yesterday with a mom whom we met at SickKids.  Her baby daughter passed away in December.  It's really amazing to me the number of people we know who have children who have passed away.

I was looking at the first page that I wrote for my letter to Josiah that I read at the funeral and I was saddened to see two lines at the bottom of the page that I neglected to type (yes, I actually used a pen and paper to write it out first).  I had written, "I long to see you and Isaac together again.  On that day I think you'll tell him what an amazing brother he was."

We had a call tonight from a relative whose children passed away.  She was encouraging me and let me know that she also didn't grieve a whole lot and thought the reason for that was because she had no regrets and knew that she was the best mother her children could possibly have and said that the same was true for Graham and me.  I was so thankful to hear Graham say at the funeral, "We would do it all again." in reference to fighting for Josiah's life from day one.  We certainly would.   

It was nice to be in church this morning.  We went to the grave site tonight and watered the grave.  We keep getting surprised at how lovely the place is.  We went for a longer walk there tonight and found two fountains and bridges and boardwalks through a marshy area.  Isaac liked walking on the labyrinth.  There is an old church that was moved there where people actually have weddings.

Isaac was a little fragile at times today.  After he awoke from his nap he cried for quite a long time.  He just sounded so sad.  He wanted to have a cuddle and just cry.  

These photos were taken late last week.  Thanks so much for your prayers!

Blessings,

Elizabeth

P.S. I hate that I look 4 or 5 months pregnant when I am only 2.  It serves me right for all I've eaten this past year.

Hebrews 4:16

Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.